"There are sixty Socialists in the White House!" Uncle Joe suddenly cried.

"Ohh," Birdbill cooed. "That sounds even better."

"This Obama crowd is anti-American and anti-Christian nation!" snarled Mad Hannity.

"Off with their heads!" cried an imperious voice. Alice recognized the White
Queen Ann. "Use the second amendment! Remember the Alamo!"

"What does that mean?" Alice asked. "Are you advocating violence against political opponents, including the President of the United States?"

"What President?" Rash awoke and cried. "That pirate killer? He’s not legitimate!"

"But he was elected by a large margin," Alice noted.

"Exactly!" Mad Hannity said. "Was he appointed by the Supreme Court? Hah! He was not!"

"Did we have to send thugs to intimidate election officials and wait weeks to know if he got in? Did we even have to wait until the next day? And you call him a president!" O’Really shouted. "And look at the polls! He’s above 60%! When did the president have numbers like that? It’s mind control!"

Suddenly two figures dressed exactly alike came running breathlessly past the table. "Obama is a fascist!" one shouted. "Obama is a communist!" the other cried.

"I’ve seen you before," Alice said slowly. "You’re Tweedlebeck and Tweedlemalkin, though I confess I still cannot tell which is which."

"He’s taking away our freedom!" they both pouted. "He’s got the CIA and the NSA spying on our tea party!"

"Nonsense," Alice said firmly. "Besides, when I saw you before, you said that President Bush had every right to spy on anyone—that our civil liberties are worthless if we’re dead."

"You must be one of them!" Tweedlemalkin screamed. She formed a cross with her fingers and began circling Alice and chanting, "CNN, MSNBC, CNN, MSNBC!"

Tweedlebeck sank down into a chair and began to cry. "You just don’t understand. Nobody understands."