RECALL ARNOLD!
by Theron Dash

Now in our second minute of gathering signatures on petitions to recall Governor Arnold (we still can't spell his last name---reason number one to get rid of the sucker!), the Recall Governor Arnold Movement aka Terminate the Terminator is pioneering the politics of Anticipatory Boredom Remover.

Just thinking about how dull life (i.e. media) will be without a recall campaign is motivation enough. But think as well of all the really hard stuff we'll have to hear about when the circus leaves town. Fortunately California leads the way once again, especially in our cutting edge entertainment-news- industrial complex. Not only have we solved the budget crisis in the default choice of the truly desperate (when too little money is available for too much and there are no good choices, the solution is to throw it all away as fast as possible) but we see the future ordained by the logic of cable TV news: total recall all of the time. Like so totally.

Recall Arnold is the place to be. That he may not win the election is beside the point---who cares about the other nonentities and politicians? Let's get started, and give people something to sign in the Safeway lot.